My son’s Cub Scout pack volunteered to feed the needy one night, so I joined in. We arrived at a church in our hometown around 4:00 to help set-up tables, chairs, and do the dining room prep work such as make punch, fill pitchers, pop popcorn, etc.. The people were let into the gym/dining room at 5:00. I was able to talk to a few guys, one that had no connection to reality at all.
He approached me saying, “I’m singing ‘Amazing Grace’ tonight at the train station.”
“Great song,” I said.
“My name’s Larry. My Indian name is Rising Sun. They also call me The Wizard, cause I’m expert at taking out the trash.’”
I talked to him for about five minutes of rapid-fire unconnected statements. I then talked to a guy that was in my high school graduating class. It saddened me to know that he’d probably had a pretty tough life.

We served the food for about 45 minutes, about 130 people came through the line. I remember thinking that if they allowed the people to serve themselves buffet-style they’d need less helpers. Maybe they’re afraid of them stealing the ladles. We then helped clean-up the tables and floors. Everyone seemed to leave happy. The next day however when I was driving around town I saw many of the same people we had served the night before loitering around liquor stores, riding bikes and smoking cigarettes, and I really wondered whether we’d done these people any good or just enabled them to continue on their destructive paths. My wife and I talked about it that night.

“Are we doing the right thing if we’re enabling 90% of the people to help the 10% that really need help and are trying to help themselves?” It’s a decision for each person to make for themselves, but we both thought it was worth the effort to help a few at the expense of enabling the masses.

Life Lesson: Sometimes giving is enabling bad behavior. Make sure you‘re helping and not enabling.

How You Can Do It Too: Look up charities or homeless services in your area, they love volunteers!